Saturday, May 27, 2006

Ear to Ear

dog_with_huge_ears


I've come across many interesting things about ears lately. So listen up (hahahahaah!) and I'll tell you about them.

First, there's this device called the Mosquito that supposedly creates an annoying sound that only teenagers can hear. Its purpose is to "chase away those annoying teenagers!!!" (direct quote from the site). This is just wrong on so many levels. First of all, I'm sure it's not only teens who will hear it. I can still hear the high-pitched squeal of CRT televisions that most people are oblivious to. If it's anything like that, my well-beyond-teenaged ears will pick up on it. But worse is the blatant discrimination this device embodies. Calling an entire group of people "annoying" and creating a device that hurts them is so obviously evil that I'm surprised they're allowed to sell this. It's no better than putting steep steps in front of your store, so those annoying frail old ladies can't get in. Or a scary dog that only barks at those annoying black people.

The second ear story is Do Earlobes Have a Purpose? If you're too lazy to click, the article basically says "no, they have no purpose." They're an "evolutionary hiccup". I don't find the answer entirely satisfying...did they ever have a purpose? Why would they show up in the first place? Maybe they are sexual displays, there to be pierced to attract mates. This guy probably gets all the ladies:

Pierced Ears


Or maybe lobes used to help wiggle our ears into a better position to hear with. This leads to the last story: Noisy Wiggling Ears Explained. Many people can wiggle their ears (I can), and the article goes into how there is a part of the brain dedicated to this, and how other muscles (e.g. eye muscles) are involved in wiggling. What I didn't know is that the human ear can also produce noise. It can make little clicks...though it's unclear if this is at all related to wiggling. The weirdest thing, though, is that these clicks are loudest in heterosexual women, and less loud in bi or homosexual women (and all men just suck at ear clicks).

So remember ladies, if you "choose" to become homosexual, it may affect your ability to make noise with your ears. Oh wait, that makes no sense. It's probably actually some common brain structure that controls both ear clicking and sexual preference. Since we don't choose the structure of our brains, this is even more evidence to the support the obvious conclusion that sexual preference is not a choice (I only mention this because I blabbed about the topic a few days ago).

Corn

13 comments:

Dani said...

I see you have a lot of time on your hands. Running out of topics to write about?

One of the sexiest parts on my husband is his earlobes, I just love to rub them.

I can wiggle my ears too, and I can raise one eyebrow at a time - impressed? Does that mean anything special?

Anonymous said...

Not sure if you've picked up a newspaper in the last couple years but the argument in Canada has now moved beyond this and we are debating gay marriage, not if being gay is a choice.
Sure, you'll always find some fundalmentists to fight you on this but its yesterdays news.
This debate would have been good in 1965, not 2006.

Mayank said...

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Nice writing and even I am sure that, that guy must be having thousands of girl friends :)

Jason said...

Weird comments on here today.

I see Dani found some time in between Bible study class and gay bashing to pop in and say hello.

Phronk said...

Dani: I wish I had a lot of time on my hands. Hey, you can wiggle your ears AND raise one eyebrow? It's the sign of the Devil! Get thee to an exorcist!

Anonymous: I agree it's yesterday's news, but there is still a lot of opposition to the obvious. Please read the other post I linked to...it's in direct response to a fundamentalist who's stuck in 1965 (^^^ I won't name names ^^^). Gay marriage is an entirely separate issue (which I'm quite aware of...I live in Canada, dude), so I don't know why you even bring it up here.

Mayank: Thanks for the kind words. I'll send you an email to hear your suggestions. I'd love to be search engine friendly, as long as it doesn't involve any effort.

Jason: Yeah, weird comment day! Nice to see a familiar face. Even though it's your ugly mullet avatar.

StopSpamming said...

So how is that thesis coming along :)

Fun article...Can't say I ever noticed any internal ear noises. I can't wiggle my ears, or raise my eyebrows separately...this means I'm..Oh No...??

I'm a saintly atheist :D

Dani said...

Oh yeah - I forgot to mention that I can wiggle my nostrils too. I am super talented and full of demons.

Better go for now - this Sunday is cat sacrifices at church, yippie! Then we're having a potluck afterwards - Mmmm delicious!

I gotta iron my good dress and curl my hair so I can look my best while the blood is squirting everywhere. It sure can get kinda messy.

Can I get an Amen?

Praise Jesus!

Anonymous said...

Jason,
You are calling people wierd? Take a look your own blog buddy, now thats wierd.

Phronk said...

Where are all you anonymous weirdos coming from?

sarah said...

Phronky, you're the coolest. I'm glad you don't let the bad people get you down. :)

Jason said...

I don't know what wierd is.

StopSpamming said...

hey dani...
Amen!! ...and cat potluck is tastier than hairy leg.

:)

Salem said...

Re: The Mosquito
Now I'm really curious. I want to know if I can still hear than awful high pitch sound from the CRT televisions. I'm not sure if I'm not hearing it because I got older, or if it's just because I don't use one anymore.