When I moved out, I took all the cookbooks that V didn't want. One of them was Rachael Ray's "30 Minute Get Real Meals". Running out of frozen TV dinners, I thumbed through it looking for something to cook.
Here is the cover of the book:
You can see from the fake uncomfortable smile that Ray knows something is wrong with this book. How bad can it be, though? The title - "Get Real Meals" - sounds like it's just another cookbook full of quick meals. "Get Real" is a little odd, since there shouldn't be anything particularly unreal about food, but she needed to title it something different from her other books. And that pasta dish on the cover looks pretty tasty.
But then you open up the book, and there is something strange about the recipes. Everything looks OK, but not great. You can't put your finger on it, but something is missing.
Then you read the inside of the dust jacket, and you find out the horrible truth; this is a low-carb cookbook.
If there's one type of book you should be able to judge by its cover, it's a cookbook. The theme of a cookbook should be obvious before you even read the back or open it up. Yet "get real" has absolutely nothing to do with carbs. Oh, and there's a fucking bowl of pasta on the cover. What represents carbs better than pasta?
But then you read further, and discover that no, it's not really a low-carb cookbook. "Get real" actually refers to the fact that it's just not realistic to live without desserts or pasta. So it's actually a book of recipes for meals that still have carbs, just not as much as some other meals. These are, of course, useless to anyone on a low-carb diet, which requires almost no carbs for the body to go into a state of starvation and start eating itself (*). It's also useless for anyone on a normal diet, since these are just watered-down versions of meals that used to taste good.
In conclusion: Rachael Ray has a stupid laugh and is a shitty talk show host.
See also: There is something wrong with Giada De Laurentiis.
* I tried Atkins for a few weeks once. I lost a few pounds, but found that I no longer enjoyed eating. Or life. So instead, I went on this crazy new diet where I eat less calories than I burn off through exercise.
P.S. Anyone remember this?