Monday, March 24, 2008


Life is all about lumps.

A girl meets a boy and she gets a lump in her throat. He's got bulging lumps in all the right places. The lumps on her chest give him a lump in his pants.

More lumps and humps, and soon there's another tiny lump growing in the girl's belly. There are lumps of wedding cake and lumps of bills to pay, but soon the girl becomes mom and the boy becomes dad, and that tiny lump is a whole new person.

The little lump is now a little girl. There's lumpy gravy at Easter, and there's ironing the lumps out of her church clothes with mom on summer Sunday mornings, and there's jumping in lumps of leaves in the fall, and there's dad pushing her down lumps of snow in the winter.

But soon dad's lumps are disappearing and mom's are starting to sag. One morning she finds a new lump there, and a few years later, mom is just a lump of skin and bone in a lump of dirt.

The lumps of bills turn into piles. The beer gives dad a lump in his belly, and all he does is sit there like a lump unless he's giving the girl a few new lumps on her face.

Tired of lumps in the road of life, the girl finds a tiny lump of cash, throws a lump of clothes in a suitcase, and she's off. She sleeps on lumpy mattresses and lumpy pillows, and occasionally eats lumpy liquid that passes for food.

But slowly, some of those lumps smooth out while others grow.

She's got chest lumps of her own now, and soon she'll find a boy who gives her a lump in her throat.



Unknown said...

You post made me think of the song "A Vicious Circle" on the record Lumpy Gravy by Frank Zappa
-- Mr. Wisdumb,

Dead Robot said...

And what of all that junk?

All that junk?

All that lovely lady junk?

(or however else that damn song goes)

sarah said...

uhh... gross?

Unknown said...

cool post