Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Soap

I have become bored with depression, so I will now be happy.

This is now a positive thinking self-improvement blog.

Here are some positive things about my life:
  • I don't have to close the bathroom door when I pee.
  • I can be selfish with my time and energy. I can eat whenever I want. I can sleep whenever and wherever I want. I can spend a whole evening writing or drawing or working out, if I want to. Or I can spend it playing Guitar Hero in my underwear.
  • I also have more free time and energy. I can devote it to improving myself; doing better in school, getting in good shape, and generally making myself really really good looking so maybe one day I can have someone else to devote quality time and energy toward.
  • It's getting nice outside (although, seriously people, it's not nice enough for tank tops and short shorts quite yet.)
  • I don't have to feel the least bit guilty when I check out a pretty girl's bottom.


...

Today I saw Stuart Chandler from All My Children walking out of St. Joseph's hospital. Now, I know what you're thinking, you're thinking "are you sure it wasn't Adam Chandler? They're twins you know". But no, it was definitely Stuart. They totally look different.

Something about spring must bring out the celebrities.

11 comments:

sarah said...

When I was in a relationship, I was actively encouraged to play guitar hero in my underwear. Seriously.

I'm glad you are feeling good today. I feel rotten and I think I'm going back to bed now.

Bill Deys said...

Great attitude! A few counter points though.

As a guy you should almost never HAVE to close the door to pee in your own place and remind me to never play Guitar Hero at your house (not that I would ever be at your house but you never know!

Captain Bee said...

"WHAT IS THIS?! A CENTER FOR ANTS?!?!"

Phronk said...

True, Bill, but it might be polite if other people are trying to watch TV and don't want it interrupted by loud splashing sounds. And my Guitar Hero playing would rock you so hard you wouldn't even notice the nudity.

Bee: Haha, I was about to comment that I have no idea what the fuck you're talking about, then it clicked. Nice.

Tai said...

No matter what. I will never play guitar hero in my underwear. Alone; with company; in a soundproof blacked-out box; with a fox; in a house with a mouse. Never.

(Yeah, kinda channeled Suess there for a minute.)

Phronk said...

But come on people, underwear is the closest thing to wearing spandex, except wearing spandex. I can't imagine rocking to full potential in anything but the tightest of clothing.

Ashli said...

Psh. You can still do all those things and be in a relationship! Well..the whole peeing with the door open thing..maybe not..but when you're alone sure!

And thanks for the comment on my blog. You commented before I did the edit with all the stats added. It's sad really.

My ex boss was shut down (finally)and they found 40 sick cats (1 dead, 15 had to be euthanised) 15 sick dogs (5 had parvo) 3 puppies that needed to be euthanised (they had no palettes and were left to starve simply because he didn't believe in euthanasia)

Its a sad sad world sometimes :( Give your dog a big hug for me.

OMG..I wrote a fucking novel.

Phronk said...

Oh just let me pretend that there is something positive about being soul-numbingly alone. :)

Aw, my dog must have known I was thinking about her because she came over and I did indeed give her lots of hugs and kisses.

I don't know the full story with your ex boss, but it sounds horrible and I'm glad something happened. Cruelty to animals is one of the most fucked up things in this world...I can barely think about it without shaking.

Adorable Girlfriend said...

You're closing that door if AG is over.

jali said...

I like all the Stuarts I know.

(unrelated to anything you've said except for the use of the name, but that's how I roll)

Mitzzee said...

i wudn't know him from adam. tee hee