Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Search Terms Used to Find, Volume 7

I'm still writing that novel (almost 30 000 words, motherfuckers!), so I don't have time for a real blog post. Here are ways that people have found recently:

- conservative cake
- bob ross joy of painting book 23

- how to keep things out of my 3 year olds mouth
- how to talk interesting
- why isnt cussing beeped on hell's kitchen dvd

- ice cream wars in london

And I still get plenty of:
- uwo nude girls
- saugeen stripper's name
    - sookie wtf
    - does anyone else think charlaine harris's books suck?
    [always good to phrase Google searches as if you're talking to a room full of people]

    - some children find an ancient scroll in their attic. they read it in the playground, unknowingly trapping the soul of satan himself in the monkey bars. the jungle gym's killing spree won't stop until
    [someone in Australia searched for this. It's an exact quote from one of my one hundred original ideas for horror films]

    - sucking and fucking
    - suckingandfucking
    - ladies sucking and fucking
    - [etc. x 100]

    - aliens pee-pee and barf
    - carrie pees on mythbusters
    - fish in vagina porn
    - fucked by a giraffe
    - do people fart a lot when they burn fat

    - how can you write on your own facebook wall [I get this all the time, and can't figure it out. I don't know which Facebook other people are looking at, but on mine, writing on my own wall is one of the few easy things to accomplish there. It's the giant text box right in the middle of the screen.]

    And speaking of finding this blog: I'm thinking of moving it over to a real domain. If anyone out there links to here, please make sure the link is to . Links to individual posts will be broken.

    I will be back to regularly scheduled blogging in a few weeks.


    carissajaded said...

    Ummm.. so DO people fart alot when they burn fat? Or what I want to know is Do you burn a lot of fat when farting? If this is the case, maybe we should both start.

    That's weird that someone googled the exact quote that you wrote in your post.. kinda creppy eh?

    Phronk said...

    I dunno, I'd rather have a few extra pounds than be one of those people who farts all the time.

    It IS creepy. It's weirder that it's someone way over in Australia taking such a weird specific interest in what I've written.

    Forest City Fashionista said...

    Hey, congratulations on the 30,000 words! I've been on time for work 3 days in a row, and posting regularly on my blog, so it appears we're all on track on our goals for this month.

    aimee adler said...

    Conservative cake? Haha!

    Jay Ferris said...

    As a tall man, I'm not ashamed to admit that your blog was a serendipitous find while trying to track down some hot giraffe porn.